Good leaders draw near.
I wrote this article a few years ago on a blog that no longer exists. It feels worth reviving right now as I continue to hear stories of employees feeling disconnected from their leaders, and vice versa. Due to today’s prevalence of remote work environments, several tips for building meaningful connection in a virtual world have been added.
Several years back, I asked a senior executive to meet with a group of relatively young, but eager rising leaders. He showed up in jeans, which did not match the company’s cultural norms, hoping to come across as approachable despite his high ranking. He adjusted his style to draw near…and, in return, the young employees felt comfortable to ask candid questions and share their ideas.
Another time, I walked the factory floor with a Senior Vice President who stopped multiple times along the way to converse with various mechanics. She learned their names and assumed the role of a student, asking them to teach her about the work they were doing. She left the bounds of her office to draw near… and, in return, they felt valued and respected.
One other time, I watched a senior leader welcome a group of new hires at their orientation. He purposefully left his phone in his office, stating that he didn’t want any distractions during his time with them. He made himself fully present to draw near…and, in return, they felt engaged (and extra chatty, going 45 minutes past the allotted Q&A time!).
Good leaders draw near. There is power in proximity. The people we are leading, and therefore serving, need to feel us present. We can’t understand their challenges unless we get close enough experience their viewpoint. Most importantly, we don’t need the answers to their problems before drawing close; instead, drawing close helps to unveil the answers.
These wise insights on the power of proximity were emphasized by Bryan Stevenson, Founder and Executive Director of the Equal Justice Initiative, at the Global Leadership Summit and they have been echoing in my head since. And while Bryan uses these truths to powerfully serve and empower marginalized communities, the same principles apply to every leader.
As humans, we are wired to avoid discomfort. Drawing near is often uncomfortable, but trust is built in proximity. Transparency flourishes in proximity. Understanding and empathy are developed in proximity. And the path forward is identified in proximity. We must be willing to draw near, comfortable or not. As Mr. Stevenson said, “Great leaders are willing to do uncomfortable things.” And I’ll add that great leaders are also willing to do inconvenient things. Drawing near takes time and may feel slow, but in the long-run, it will create employees who deliver better, more sustainable results, time and time again.
So draw near. If you don't know how to do this remotely, here are a few ideas to get you started.
Building connection in a remote environment
Establish daily check-ins as a team or through one-on-ones. When in the office, you see your employees every day. The same should continue when remote.
Be accessible. Provide multiple communication methods, paired with clear guidelines for engagement. Here’s an example:
For urgent needs, send me a text. I tend to respond more quickly via text than voicemail.
I’ll be checking email three times per day, including one last check at 4:30 p.m. I promise to respond to any emails at that time.
Please save items that are not time-sensitive for our weekly 1-1.
Use video. Over 90% of communication happens through nonverbals. Your employees need to see you, and you need to see them. Also, be sure to turn off other distractions, such as phone and email notifications, when you're in these meetings.
Plan a social event, like a virtual team lunch. Provide Uber Eats gift cards so employees can have lunch delivered, then eat together via videoconference.
Check-in frequently through quick texts, Slack messages, IMs, etc. The purpose is not to micromanage, but to show that you are thinking of them.
And perhaps most importantly, leave no room for uncertainty. When even a sliver of uncertainty exists, the brain gladly replaces it with a story. For example, a client recently noticed some uncharacteristic interactions with his boss. He immediately assumed that he had done something to upset him. The brain loathes ‘the unknown’ and replaces it with assumptions, even when we don’t have the facts or data needed to draw an accurate conclusion. You do not want your employees drawing inaccurate conclusions. To avoid uncertainty:
Give more positive recognition than ever. Affirm the good work you see them doing, including seemingly insignificant things, like a well-drafted email or effective presentation. Be specific, not vague, in the feedback.
When constructive feedback is needed, give it. We actually feel more confident and motivated when we have clarity of improvement opportunities (versus wondering what our boss is thinking). Again, be specific and show your commitment to their development and success.
Overcommunicate company goals, strategies, metrics, updates, etc. Even when you have unfavorable news to share, know that the brain responds better to bad news than it does to uncertainty.
What have you done to strengthen connection with your employees? I’d love to hear your ideas—share in the comments below!