The brain’s response to people who disagree with you
When two people with opposing positions enter a debate, it typically escalates to even stronger division, rather than greater understanding (or any hint of alignment). Instead of learning from and considering the other person’s opinion, we tend to dig our heels in the ground even more in these situations.
Why is that? What makes it so challenging to humbly consider an alternative view? One reason is because of the way our brains react.
From a neuroscience perspective, the human brain makes sense of the world by categorizing things. It uses previous knowledge and experience to inform new beliefs and decisions—and it does this rapidly, without our conscious awareness.
This categorizing functionality applies to people as well. In nearly every human interaction, our brains automatically and subconsciously categorize the other person as familiar or unfamiliar; like us or not like us; with us or against us; in-group or out-group.
But there’s good news—our brains can recategorize people as in-group, even when strong differences exist.
Research conducted by Jay Van Bavel, a social neuroscientist at New York University, supports this truth. We know that the brain interprets race as a categorizable factor; but when Jay and his colleagues assigned people to two mixed-race teams, brain scans suggested that the importance of race decreased in their minds. Participants recategorized teammates as in-group members simply because of their shared team identity and, when this happened, they automatically paid less attention to their differences.
Our brains will continue to take mental shortcuts and categorize things no matter how hard we try to stop it. Here are three things you can do to deter unhelpful categorization.
Find common ground. When engaging with someone who seems different from you, actively seek to find something in common—trivial or significant.
Listen to understand. Spend time with people different from you with a singular goal of learning about their experiences, what they believe and why. Remember, it’s an exercise in understanding, not one of proving points or changing minds. You don’t have to agree with their perspective and they don’t have to agree with yours, but increased understanding will broaden your ability to empathize.
Focus on creating shared goals as a team. Shared goals and shared team identity unify even the most diverse group of individuals. If your team doesn’t have clear goals, hold a meeting this week to set 4Q objectives and ensure each individual understands their role in accomplishing them. Bonus points for identifying a shared team reward for accomplishing the goals.
Our brains are a powerful force. Understanding how they function can help us leverage the force for good.